Should a couple who experienced infidelity give up on sex? Or is there a way to approach sex that feels safe and honest for both parties?
Sex in Marriage
Bonus! #92: When the Woman You Love Was Abused
It’s been proven that the effects of childhood abuse follow us into adulthood. Memories, anxiety, and feelings of shame can leave women overwhelmed with emotions they don’t understand—and their husbands equally confused! In this episode, Juli sits down with Dawn Scott Damon, author of When a Woman You Love Was Abused, to share wisdom and insight for husbands, helping them to love their wives well through the journey of recovery and healing.
Struggling With Sexual Intimacy? You Might Need A “Sex Break”
Is it ever a good idea to take a break from having sex with your spouse? Juli explains why the answer might be yes.
#535 What Men Weren’t Taught About Sex
Sam Jolman, author of “The Sex Talk You Never Got”, joins Juli to talk about what men didn’t learn about sex growing up.
#534 Four Surprising Things Killing Your Wife’s Sex Drive
Dr. Jennifer Degler discusses some of the lesser-known reasons why a woman might not feel excited about sexual intimacy with her husband.
#528 The 3 Superpowers Your Sex Life is Missing
Christian Sex Therapist Dr. Michael Sytsma joins Juli to talk about three ways couples can boost their sexual and emotional intimacy.
Q&A: How Do I Know if My Spouse Is Repentant After a Betrayal?
How do you know if your spouse is repentant after a betrayal?
#473 Repentance, Redemption, and Revolution: How to Accept the Invitation of Godly Sexuality
What does it actually look like to accept the invitation to reclaim God’s design for sexuality in your life? Is the path straight, wide, and flat, or narrow, bumpy, and full of twists and turns? In this episode of Java with Juli, Juli hosts guests Cole and Caitlin Zick of Moral Revolution as they discuss their polar-opposite experiences embracing their sexuality as God intended.
#462 Beautiful Union: How Our Sexuality Reveals God’s Heart for Covenant Love
uli sits down with Joshua Butler to talk about his book, “Beautiful Union”.
Q&A: How Do I Learn to Trust My Spouse Again After an Affair?
How do you learn to trust again when your spouse has had an affair?
#373: How We Beat a Porn Addiction in Our (Millennial) Marriage
When Clinton and Charity Muñoz sought help to overcome a porn addiction, Clinton was told to memorize more scripture and...
Transcript: #558 Christians Need To Change The Way They Talk About Married Sex
A transcript of Java with Juli #558, where Dr. Juli Slattery shared a discussion with guest Dr. Doug Rosenau.
#555 Can You Have A Great Marriage Without Sex? Juli Answers Your Questions
Join Juli and Hannah for a brief exploration of good biblical theology on sex and marriage.
#554 Sex and the Female Body: How to Swap Shame For Celebration
Francie Winslow, joins Juli to explain how she is learning to embrace the goodness of God’s design for sex.
#552 When You Want Sex More Than Your Husband Does
Sheri Mueller, LCPC, author of “I Want Him to Want Me”, joins Juli to share insights, wisdom, and encouragement.
How To Tell if Your Spouse Is Truly Repentant
After a betrayal, how can you know if your spouse is truly repentant? Juli unpacks a recent conversation with Jeremy Smith, LPC, as he shares what to look for.
Q&A: Is Sex Necessary For Intimacy?
Is sex necessary for intimacy?
Q&A: We Have Sex Regularly, but My Husband Never Seems Satisfied. What Do I Do?
What do you do if your spouse never seems satisfied with the sex you’re having?
Q&A: Sex Has Never Been Pleasurable in Our Marriage. Should I Just Fake It?
If you don’t enjoy sex, should you just fake it?
Q&A: Is Sending Nudes and Homemade Porn Okay if We’re Married?
What’s okay to do sexually in marriage?
#443: Is Your View of Sex and Marriage Gift-worthy?
When marriage is simply about getting our needs met, we end up playing whack-a-mole with symptoms of sin and brokenness that pop up...
#439: Pelvic Floor Health 101 (It’s About More Than Just Sex)
Nearly 3 out of 4 women experience pain during or after sex. If that's you, we have good news: a pelvic floor therapist can help....
Prioritize Sexual Intimacy by Getting Your Bedroom Ready, Part 3
One very practical and creative way to work on sexual intimacy in your marriage is to put thought and intention into the physical space of your bedroom. Whether or not you are aware of it, the environment of your bedroom impacts your sexual intimacy. Here is a quick...
Prioritize Sexual Intimacy by Getting Your Body Ready, Part 2
Much of my work in helping people navigate sexual issues revolves around how we think about sex. Your thought life, and your understanding of God and sex, are very important to your sex life. However, the basic truth is this: you can’t have sex without a body. Sex,...
Prioritize Sexual Intimacy by Getting Your Mind Ready, Part 1
“Your most important sex organ is your brain.” I remember when I first heard this statement as a young married woman. Enjoying sex is practically impossible without thinking about it. Both men and women can struggle to know how to think about sex in a way that is...
#421: “God, Sex, and Your Marriage”-Juli Answers Your Questions
You're starting to see how sexual intimacy is a reflection of covenant love. But what does that actually look like in your sex...
#420: Bonus! What Redemption and Sexual Intimacy Look Like in Real Life
Sex was nothing like what they were told it was going to be. She felt pain. He felt guilt. Together, they're on a journey toward...
#419: Why Sexual Intimacy is About So Much More Than Just Having Sex
Are you working from the wrong understanding of what makes a great sex life? Find out in this conversation from Juli's new book God,...
#418: What Is Sexual Intimacy Supposed To Look Like in Marriage?
Imagine that you and your spouse are building a jigsaw puzzle, but you don’t know what the picture on the front of the box looks...
How To Go From Demand and “Duty Sex” to True Sexual Intimacy
As Roy and Stacy listened to their pastor teach on I Corinthians 7, they began to shift uncomfortably in their seats. “Paul is saying here that a wife is to meet her husband’s sexual needs. If she doesn’t, he may be tempted to seek sex outside of their relationship.”...
What To Wear in the Bedroom?
Do you need to change what you wear in the bedroom? Like me, maybe you choose your sleepwear based on comfort and not to entice. I much prefer Life is Good to Victoria Secret in the bedroom, but we will save that conversation for another day. Even though I sometimes...
#410: Sexual Abuse in Marriage and How To Help a Hurting Wife
Sexual abuse in marriage... wait. What? Doesn't the Bible say a spouse "has authority" over the other's body? Let's talk practically...
#394: Debt-free in the Bedroom: How To Heal From Sexual Pain
Have you experienced sexual trauma? Were you betrayed in marriage? Are there sexual choices from your past that you'd take back...
#390: Have You Given Up On Sexual Enjoyment and Pleasure?
Are you resigned to the idea that God must have created sex for your husband, but not for you? Juli and her guest, Dr. Debra Taylor,...
#387: Life, Intimacy and Loving Your Body After Breast Cancer & Reconstruction
Kim Harms was diagnosed with breast cancer shortly after her fortieth birthday. In this episode, Juli grabs coffee with Kim to...
#379: Is Your Love Life All That You Want It To Be?
Is this really all there is? If you’ve ever felt this way about your sex life, you’re not alone. In this episode, Dr....
#368: Aging Bodies Can Still Enjoy Sexuality. Are You Giving Up Too Soon?
There's ED (erectile dysfunction), PE (premature ejaculation), and PS — premature surrender. According to our guest, many Boomer...
Predictability and Passion Can Improve a Boring Sex Life
If you are married, there is a very good chance that you and your spouse have different sexual appetites. This not only applies to how often you want to have sex, but also to how adventurous you would each like to be in the bedroom. A healthy sex life has aspects of...
Spice Up Your Sex Life
Are you feeling stuck in your home and in your sex life? Think back to the last time you left your house: It could possibly have been four or five weeks! And most likely it has been even longer since you and your spouse went out for a date night. When my husband and I...
#22: Intimacy, Sex & Aging
Intimacy with your spouse is important is all phases of life--even when you're celebrating your 50th wedding anniversary! Many...
Webinar: Does Your Sex Life Have Shades of Gray?
Why are some Christians okay with sex toys, masturbation, and cohabitation while others believe it's wrong to kiss before marriage? Whether you're single or married, honoring God with your sexuality means discerning the dangers of both license and legalism in the...
Why Does Sex Matter in Marriage? Pt. 2
For the past decade, my full-time job has been to address sexual issues from a Christian perspective. Knowing that, you can imagine the kind of emails I regularly receive in my inbox! What I’ve learned is that sexuality represents pain in a lot of lives and marriages....
Why Does Sex Matter in Marriage? Pt. 1
Most of us have been told that sex in marriage is important. But why does it matter? For many of us, sex may just be “meh” or tend to cause more division in our relationships than unity. The reality is that sexual issues are always among the top reasons for marital...
Beyond a Happy Marriage
Within the past month, I’ve been accused of two things that seem to be mutually exclusive. A few women have made comments like, “Why don’t you ever challenge the men? Why is it always the woman’s responsibility to build a healthy marriage?” And men have written me...
#234: We Can Do THAT in the Bedroom?
What's OK in the bedroom? Juli, Linda & Yvette tackle one of our most popular questions in this episode of Java with Juli....
#210: Enjoying Intimacy in Your Golden Years
It’s no secret that aging changes us. Our bodies don’t work the way they used to. Sex doesn’t work the way it used to. What once happened easily is now difficult and awkward. Is it time to close the chapter on sex? Not so fast! Join Juli and her guests as they...
#148: Is There a Man in the House?
It’s not just girl talk on Java with Juli. Gentlemen, today is all about you! In this episode, Dr. Gary Chapman joins Juli at...
#32: Being a True Man: An Honest Discussion About A Man’s Struggle
This is an important conversation for both men and women about sexuality, with vulnerable confessions of pornography use and sinful...
Transcript: #559 What if Male Sexuality Is More Complex Than We Think?
A transcript of Java with Juli #559, where Dr. Juli Slattery shared a discussion with guest Dr. Corey Allan.
#558 Christians Need To Change The Way They Talk About Married Sex
Juli shares a conversation she had with the late Dr. Doug Rosenau talking about the beauty of sex in marriage.
#557 Understanding The Harm of Purity Culture and How to Move Forward
Dr. Camden Morgante breaks down purity culture myths, and shares how churches can embrace a more appropriate way of talking about sexuality.
¿Es necesario el perdón para la sanidad?
¿Qué dice la Biblia sobre el perdón y nuestro bienestar?
Transcript: #555 Can You Have A Great Marriage Without Sex? Juli Answers Your Questions
A transcript of Java with Juli #555, where Dr. Juli Slattery is joined by co-host Hannah Nitz.
Cómo hablar con tu cónyuge sobre el sexo
¿Por qué nos resulta más cómodo tener sexo que hablar de él?
Q&A: My spouse never wants to have sex. What do I do?
What do you do if your spouse isn’t interested in having sex?
How To Talk to Your Spouse About Sex
Why is it we’re more comfortable having sex than we are talking about it?
Q&A: What’s OK for a married couple in the bedroom?
Can married couples do whatever they want sexually?
What You Need To Know About Sex Before Your Wedding Night
How can you prepare for wedding night sex if you’ve never had it before? We explore 3 ideas to help you get ready for first-time sex.
#228: Intimacy After Infidelity
Can a couple’s sexual relationship survive and thrive after infidelity?
#515 Is Attraction Sinful? Unpacking Attachment, Safety, Love and Desire
Hannah Nitz joins Juli for a conversation all about attraction and desire.
How to Bridge the Gap in Mismatched Libidos in Marriage
Juli expands on a popular episode with Dr. Michael Sytsma and Shaunti Feldhahn all about how couples can bridge the sexual desire gap.
Dios Dice Que El Sexo Es Para El Matrimonio: Aquí Veremos Porqué
Guardar el sexo para el matrimonio es tan raro que se vuelve noticia cuando una pareja declara públicamente que esta es su intención.
Sexual Entitlement: What it is and Why it is Ruining Your Marriage
Yes, God created sex for marriage, but did He promise it to us?
3 Reasons Why “Faking It” is Making Your Bad Sex Life Even Worse
While faking climax or sexual enjoyment may seem like a solution when you don’t like sex, it’s not a healthy long-term strategy. Here’s why.
#454 Mismatched in Sexual Desire? You May Be Closer Than You Think
If you’re married and experiencing huge gaps between your level of sexual desire and your spouse’s, this special re-air episode is for you.
Q&A: Is It My Responsibility to Meet My Spouse’s Sexual Needs?
Is it your responsibility to meet your spouse’s sexual needs?
Q&A: Past Sexual Trauma Inhibits My Ability to Enjoy Sex. Is There Hope That I Can Ever Heal?
When trauma is in your past, is sexual enjoyment possible?
Q&A: What Should I Do If I Discover My Spouse Looking at Porn?
What do you do when you discover your spouse watches porn?
#465 Love Dares: Using Playfulness to Build Sexual Intimacy
If you’re a husband or wife who finds sex dull or monotonous, it may be time for you to revisit the way God designed marital sex. The truth is that God desires for you to enjoy building sexual intimacy with your spouse, not just endure it. In this podcast episode, Juli and guest Dr. Jennifer Degler talk about how God gives the gift of sexual play to couples, and the practical (and fun!) ways you can connect with your spouse.
Help! I’m in a Sexless Marriage!
My husband and I haven’t had sex in two years. The drought began after I had our third child. I’ve never really enjoyed sex. I was always tired, and I just didn’t think it was worth the effort anymore. Now, we don’t even talk about it. My wife and I got married about...
#457 How To Build a Flourishing (not Flawless) Sex Life You’ll Both Love
Take the guess work out of your sex life and learn how to tell (or show) your spouse what feels good in the bedroom.
#263: Experiencing Sexual Pleasure, Part 2
In part two of this conversation, you'll hear about the other two legs of the "sexual desire triangle" and go from getting your body...
#262: Experiencing Sexual Pleasure, Part 1
Unlike most men (who always seem to be in the mood, always climax, and never experience pain), sexual pleasure can be a mystery to...
#214: Answers To Your Questions About Sex, with Dr. Juli Slattery & Linda Dillow
Is it “dirty” to dress up for your husband in the bedroom? Is it wrong to masturbate if your husband can’t have sex? What if your...
#406: Every Couple Has a Sexual Dance. What Does Yours Say About You?
Sex therapist Dr. Mike Sytsma says that when a couple tells him how they kiss or how they make love, he can tell them how they...
#36: What Kind of Love Are You Making?
If there is one place in the Bible that gives women permission to have fun, to explore and to enjoy sexual pleasure, it’s the poetic...
Webinar Series: Sexual Pleasure: How To Get Your Mind and Body to Work Together, Pt 2
Overcoming Physical Barriers to Pleasure Part 2 in this webinar series Meet Dr. Carol Tanksley, OB-GYN. She has over 28 years of experience and a passion help women understand how their bodies are integrated with their minds, spirits, and emotions. In this webinar,...
Webinar Series: Sexual Pleasure: How To Get Your Mind and Body to Work Together, Pt 1
The Priority of Mutual Pleasure in Healthy Sex Part 1 in this webinar series Juli and Dr. Debra Taylor, a certified Christian sex therapist, discuss the importance of pleasure within the larger picture of sexual intimacy, and how the pleasure we experience during sex...
Webinar Series: Sexual Pleasure: How To Get Your Mind and Body to Work Together, Pt 3
Saying "Yes!" to Sexual Pleasure Part 3 in this webinar series In the final webinar in our series, Dr. Jennifer Degler brings her humor, candor, and expertise to help you understand how to get your brain and your body working together so that you can share the kind of...
#366: No More Pushing Past the Pain! God Cares About Your Sexual Pleasure
What do you do when sex hurts? Do you white-knuckle your way through it, because you think you should? In this episode, hear why...
#365: How To Create a Language That Brings Meaning to Your Lovemaking
How long would you like foreplay to last? How important is it to have an orgasm every time we have sex? Complete this sentence:...
#364: How to Work Your Way Back to Sexual Intimacy After Infidelity
After sexual infidelity, how do you know when to start having sex again? Recovery is layered, complex, and different for every...
#343: Forgiving What You Can’t Forget
Lysa TerKeurst tells Juli about the brokenness and restoration of her marriage and how forgiveness is both a decision and a process....
#337: Questions You’re Too Embarrassed to Ask About Sex
Dr. Doug Rosenau, a pioneer in Christian sex therapy, has been answering questions about sex for decades—long before most of...
#321: Taking Your Marriage Back From Porn
One of the most painful experiences as a wife is learning of your husband’s porn addiction—or learning that he’s...
#319: Is Good Sex a “Right” in Marriage?
Juli and Hannah sit down for a candid conversation about whether or not it's possible to have a good, Christian marriage and not be...
Webinar: How to Talk to Your Spouse About Sex
Talking about sex with your spouse is scary... especially when one (or both!) of you is disappointed, frustrated, or resentful about how things are currently. How do you have healthy conversations about sex, when every other attempt has been wrought with tension? ÊHow...
#294: When You Want Sex, But Your Spouse Doesn’t
In every marriage, there is typically one partner with a higher sexual drive. And that person is usually trying to convince the...
#286: How to Make Time to Make Love
Making time to make love is always going to take effort. There will always be an excuse to put it off for another season. Grab your...
#276: Parenthood, Exhaustion & Avoiding Sex
She's a busy and tired mama. He's stressed to the max with work and family. Can't they just put sex and romance on hold...
#268: BONUS! When God “Wakes Up” Your Love Life
Did you know that an intimate relationship with the Lord can lead to a more intimate relationship with your husband? In this BONUS...
#259: Our Marriage Survived Painful Sex
Jennifer went to her doctor to get help for the excruciating pain she felt during sex. She left with a clean bill of health and a...
Webinar: Overcoming Barriers in the Bedroom
Do you hate sex? Are you too tired, never in the mood, or is sex too painful? Maybe there’s too much tension in your marriage to desire any sexual intimacy with your husband. Dr. Juli Slattery will be teaching on overcoming barriers in the bedroom and sharing things...
A Secret for the Guys
Every day we hear from men who desperately want help and encouragement for their wives. Most commonly, they complain that their wives are not interested in sexual intimacy. Many of these messages end with pleas like “Help me! What can I do to help her understand my...
Your Sexual Differences Can Make You Better Lovers
Have you ever wondered why God made you and your husband so different? For many years, I thought that might be my first question to God when I got to heaven. The differences between me and my husband, particularly in the bedroom, were driving us both crazy. Sexual...
#240: Birth Control & Family Planning
Is it okay to use birth control? Can the pill cause an early abortion? Juli and her guest discuss the ethical issues that surround...
#237: BONUS! Reconstructing Intimacy After Breast Cancer
"I never imagined there would be a point in my life when a piece of me would have to be reconstructed. That at age 40 my chest...
#233: Understanding Your Man
From "All he thinks about is sex!" to "Why doesn't he ever initiate?" this Java with Juli episode has got...
#227: Couples Therapy For Intimacy Issues
Have you ever wondered whether or not you should see a sex therapist? From sexual addiction to sexual anorexia, a good therapist can...
Webinar: Sex Talk in Your Marriage: Conversations Every Couple Should Be Having
You can read books on how to have "the talk" with your kids, but do you have the talk in your marriage? We believe that conversations around sexuality should not just take place when there is a problem or you are figuring out when to have sex. In this webinar, Dr....