Your Healing Journey

Why You Still Need Boundaries As You Pursue Sexual Integrity

While we do need to reject the legalism of purity culture, Juli explains that boundaries still help us embrace godliness with our sexuality.

#480 How to Heal and Rebuild Trust and Sexual Intimacy After An Affair

Why do people cheat? And is it possible to reconcile after you or your spouse has been unfaithful? Juli is joined by Jessica McDaniel, LPC.

Contentamiento: cómo vivir con gozo a través de los altibajos de la vida

Si todo en tu vida siguiera siendo exactamente como es en este momento, ¿crees que aún podrías ser verdadera y profundamente feliz? Como mujer soltera, esto era algo que estaba acostumbrada a preguntarme. Después de todo, el matrimonio no era una certeza. Sin...

Q&A: “Past Sexual Trauma Inhibits My Ability to Enjoy Sex. Is There Hope That I Can Ever Heal?”

When trauma is in your past, is sexual enjoyment possible?

Contentment: How to Live Joyfully Through the Ups and Downs of Life

If everything in your life were to remain exactly the way it is in this current moment, do you think you could still be truly, deeply happy? As a single woman, this was something I was used to asking myself. After all, marriage was not a certainty. What surprised me...

Q&A: How Do I Learn to Trust My Spouse Again After an Affair?

How do you learn to trust again when your spouse has had an affair?

#459 How Sexual Abuse Affects You (And Why God Is Still Trustworthy)

“What happened to me wasn’t rape.” “I didn’t stop it right away.” “I shouldn’t have been at that party in the first place.”

If you’ve ever had thoughts like these, about yourself or someone else, your definition of sexual abuse is too narrow. Join us to learn what sexual abuse is and what consent isn’t. (And, if you’ve never been a victim of sexual assault, trust us, you know someone who has. This conversation is for you, too.)

#458 Why Women Are Leaving the Church (And How To Find Your Way Back)

In the last ten years, some 16 million women have stopped going to church. Are you one of them? Join us for a conversation about why we’ve been rethinking church—and why it may be time for you to go back.

Help! I’m in a Sexless Marriage!

My husband and I haven’t had sex in two years. The drought began after I had our third child. I’ve never really enjoyed sex. I was always tired, and I just didn’t think it was worth the effort anymore. Now, we don’t even talk about it. My wife and I got married about...

#456 Overcoming Father Wounds: Trading My Pain for God’s Perfect Love

Kia Stephens knows many women (like herself) who looked to the arms of other men for the affirmation they longed to receive from their fathers. You’ll love her humor, wisdom, and vulnerability as she shares how she traded the pain of what her earthly father couldn’t give her for the perfect love of her heavenly Father.

Why We Don’t Experience Victory

I recently spoke with a young woman who despises herself because of her continual struggle with lust and pornography. She’s tried to obey God and run away from sin only to find herself falling into it once again. I’ve met other people who feel similar discouragement...

#446: How Much More of Your Sexuality Will You Let God Reclaim in 2023?

Juli shares her thoughts on 2022, on having hard conversations about sexuality, and how to ask God to use painful...

#445: Give the Gift of Seeing the Good in What You Have

Seeing the good in all things does not mean ignoring the bad. Rather, as we approach the hard things, we see the...

#444: A Heart Set Free From Shame and Lies Is a Gift

Open the gift that allows you to experience real intimacy. Our long-awaited Savior came to set us free from sin and shame. Will you exchange your heart for His?

#442: How To Find Peace and Hope in the Midst of Anxiety

Linda Dillow shares about the loss of her daughter during the pandemic, how God used the message of “Calm My Anxious Heart” to...

#441: Understanding God’s Heart for Food and Freedom

Are you ready to end that toxic relationship in your life — your love-hate relationship with food? No more...

#438: How Your Story Becomes Sacred in the Hands of Jesus

Glenn Packiam joins Juli to talk about how the biblical metaphor of ordinary table bread reveals God’s...

#416: How God Uses Heartache to Prepare You for Your True Calling

Dr. Dan Allender and Cathy Loerzel join Juli to share about Redeeming Heartache—a new book and tool (think Enneagram or DISC) to...

#411: The Unlikely Means God Uses To Bring Beauty From Ashes

What are the unlikely (often unwelcome) means that God uses to heal us? Join us to find out and discover the power of being fully...

How Do I Know If I’m in an Abusive Relationship?

On the surface, they looked like a perfect Christian couple. Always together, with his arm around her waist. Her friends would admit to feeling a bit jealous. Abby never goes anywhere without Jake; he’s so attentive. I can barely get my husband to notice that I’m in...

#409: Divorce & Remarriage (Abuse, Infidelity, Porn & All the Hard Things)

God's word is clear on marriage; but some of us are a little fuzzy on the divorce and remarriage part. What exactly does "sexual...

“God Doesn’t Care” and 3 Other Lies You Might Believe About Sex

I’ll never be able to kick porn for good! I hate sex. I’ll never be able to enjoy it with my husband. I’m damaged beyond repair. I can’t have a great sex life if I don’t have a beautiful body. Have thoughts like these ever crossed your mind? If so, where do you think...

#402: If God Made My Body “Good,” Why Does It Cause So Much Pain?

Juli is joined by author and apologist Sam Allberry to share how we can reconcile the goodness of our bodies (which are created by...

#398: How Trauma-Informed Care Helps Your Brain, Body & Relationships

“Trauma-informed care” is more than just a pop psychology buzzword. Join Juli and her guest to learn about the experiences that we...

#395: How to Be Intentional to Care For Your Mental Health & Wellness

One in 3 Americans report experiencing symptoms of clinical depression. How about you? In this conversation, Dr. Juli Slattery and...

3 Razones por las que puedo correr a Dios con mi quebrantamiento sexual

Mi invitada en el blog esta semana es Julia Mitchell. Julia es la Coordinadora de Participación de Usuarios y Miembros para Authentic Intimacy. Para mí, esta pregunta es donde todo comienza: ¿Puedo realmente confiarle a Dios todo, incluyendo mi sexualidad? Todavía me...

#65: Why Healing Takes Time, with Francine Rivers

Juli sits down with author Francine Rivers to hear how her own story of brokenness and healing after an abortion...

3 Reasons I Can Run To God With My Sexual Brokenness

This question is where it all begins for me: Can I really trust God with everything, including my sexuality? (Presione aquí para leer en español) I still picture myself in my room that night, tossing and turning, overwhelmed by the anguish in my soul. Gripping the...

Q&A: Is it appropriate to share about past affairs with my adult kids?

In this week's video, Juli shares three considerations when prayerfully deciding whether to share about past affairs with adult children. "I had affairs early in our marriage which my husband knows about from my confession and repentance years ago. We've needed to...

#385: How To Wrestle With God Over Questions of Sex & Sexuality

Come deconstruct with us for 40 minutes or so. Yep, that's right. If we can’t ask hard questions about the...

#372: How To Recognize Domestic Abuse

Wearing sunglasses on rainy days. Using turtlenecks to hide choke marks. Running. Hiding. Ramona Probasco never thought she would do...

Webinar Series: 3 Conversations To Help You Heal From Sexual Trauma, Pt 3

From Sexual Trauma to Sexual Intimacy (It Takes Two) Part 3 in this webinar series In this final conversation, Juli talks with Matt Gutbrod, a sexual abuse survivor, and his wife, Victoria, a marriage and family therapist, about how couples can practice empathy and...

Webinar Series: 3 Conversations To Help You Heal From Sexual Trauma, Pt 2

What Is Sexual Trauma & How Does It Affect You? Part 2 in this webinar series If you're in Florida, find Aline-Vanya Guillaume at TherapyTerrace.com Sexual Trauma & It's Effect On Marriage an article by Aline-Vanya Guillaume, LPSW Unwanted by Jay...

Webinar Series: 3 Conversations To Help You Heal From Sexual Trauma, Pt 1

Your Abuse Story: How To Tell, What To Tell, & Why It Matters Part 1 in this webinar series Juli Slattery and Dawn Scott Damon talk about the reasons we don't share our abuse stories. We can be accused of lying or exaggerating. We're met with silence. Our pain is...

Can Shame Ever Be a Good Thing?

“Shame on you!” If you grew up in my generation, this is a sentence you probably heard as a child. You were told that you should be ashamed of the way you treated your sister, for stealing that candy bar, or for talking back. These are also words that I’ve probably...

#360: Feeling Fearful? The Right Kind of Fear Leads to Bravery

When you’re feeling fearful, the last thing you need is a social media meme telling you to “tighten your ponytail and carry on.” A...

#353: Why Telling Your Abuse Story is Complex, Courageous & Healing

Every abuse story has unique layers of complexity and pain. The decision whether or not to tell someone else is often a difficult...

#344: Standing Strong: Tackling Fear, Self-Doubt & Insecurity

Alli Worthington says the popular message that “you are enough” is leaving women feeling overwhelmed and...

La sanidad de Dios apesta

¿Alguna vez has tenido una experiencia en la que Dios ha “revelado” el significado de un pasaje de las Escrituras en tu corazón? Recientemente, Él ha estado haciendo eso en mi corazón con Juan 11. Este es el relato de cuando Jesús resucitó a Lázaro de entre los...

Cómo elegir un consejero sabio

Después de todos tus propios esfuerzos y tus agallas, tus oraciones y búsqueda de consejos, tus lecturas e investigaciones te das cuenta de que lo has intentado todo y aún persistes en tu lucha. Llegaste a ese punto en el que sabes que necesitas...

How to Suffer Well Through Sickness

*Trigger warning, mention of assault and trauma. This past spring, I spent 30 nights alone in the hospital without my loving husband by my side. One night, as I laid in my hospital bed, I thought back on the decision I made to marry him. Little did I know how my...

Q&A: Where do I begin healing?

This question comes from a reader: "I’m in a place where God is restoring parts of my life that had been broken, so I can see His true design for these areas—including what’s happened to me in sexual abuse. What is the first step I can take with the Lord to help me...

#336: Disappointed With God? Tell Him

Are you discouraged by what is happening in our world today? Have you recently found yourself asking, “Lord, why have you allowed...

#140: The Story of A Rape Survivor

One of Hettie’s greatest fears was that she would be raped. In her home country of South Africa, it is estimated...

#331: Say Goodbye to Labels

Life is tends to put labels on us. We even pin labels on ourselves. More often than not, these labels are hurtful,...

Relational Revelation

As a Christian psychologist, I sometimes feel like I’m in the crosshairs of pastors and therapists who disagree about the road to healing. Those who study theology and teach the Bible often emphasize the importance of God’s Word and prayer. Christians in the therapy...

I Despise Neediness in Myself

This guest post by Mary DeMuth first appeared here. This is one of those posts I am starting that I don’t know how it will end. During this time of COVID, racial tension, and employment worries, I (like you) have had some space to observe my life. And...

#325: BONUS! When Sex Hurts, Pelvic Floor Therapy Can Help

Past trauma, childbirth, a physical fall—just a few of the MANY reasons you might experience painful sex or sexual dysfunction....

#324: Sex Therapy: What Is It, and Why Should You Go?

Online Christian sex therapy—yes, you read that right. Did you know that there are therapists trained specifically to address issues...

Why Is Healing So Hard?

Tina and I met together for counseling several years ago to work through some traumatic experiences from her past. A year after our work together was done, Tina came in for a “check up.” She shared with me that within that year, she had undergone surgery, radiation,...

Remembering Your Way Out of Discouragement

Have you ever faced a difficult season only to have friends tell you to trust in God? While you know their advice is right, it doesn’t seem very practical. What does it actually look like to trust in God through trials and discouragement? David faced almost every...

#315: Jamie Ivey Wants to Know the Real You

There are things we feel are acceptable to struggle with, and then there are those things we would never say out loud –especially...

Java Pack: Conversations that Heal

This Java Pack is a Christian leader’s guide to addressing sexual pain. As Christians, we often spend a lot of time debating what we should believe about sexuality. We may devote some time to ensuring we are personally honoring God with our own sexual choices....

Webinar: How Can God Be Good If…?

Our beliefs about sexuality begin and end with our beliefs about God. Is He trustworthy? Is His Word reliable? Why wouldn't a loving God embrace me just the way I am? In this webinar, Juli and Dr. Jo Vitale, a Christian apologist, talk about how acknowledging the...

#311: Where Is God When We Suffer?

Sometimes life gets so hard, we doubt that Jesus is still with us. Did he abandon us? Was our faith even real in the...

Q&A: Was it my fault?

Dr. Juli Slattery answers the question: "How do I heal from an experience that wasn't quite rape? Initially I said no, but then I gave in and did it anyway (and I enjoyed parts of it). I feel awful. Do I ask for forgiveness knowing parts of this was unwanted, but also...

Taming the Tongue on Groundhog Day

I’ve heard a lot of people comment that life right now feels like the movie “Groundhog Day”—the same thing over and over again with no end in sight. While there are blessings in having our lives slow down, there are also tensions and frustrations that overflow out of...

#40: Bonus! What Do You Fear?

The COVID-19 pandemic is pushing all of our anxiety buttons; loss of loved ones, financial loss, being stuck inside...

#306: When You Can’t Wait Another Day

What do you do when you find yourself in a situation you don't like, didn't sign up for, and can't wait to be done with? (Social...

Don’t Waste the Pain

Practically every conversation I’ve had in the last week has contained a phrase like, “These are strange times.” Strange times, indeed. Never in our lives have we walked through so much uncertainty. Our health, careers, and security all seem to be dangling on a...

#298: Bonus! Sexual Identity is Big, Identity As a Child of God is Bigger

In this episode, Juli continues her conversation with Laurence Koo. Join them as they discuss the tension created when so much of...

#297: Finding Freedom in the Midst of Brokenness

Many gay Christians feel they must either deny their sexual feelings in order to be accepted by God or embrace the idea that God...

#296: An Insider’s Story of Human Trafficking

Have you ever wondered why U.S. trafficking victims don’t just run? Do you feel compassion for child victims, but...

Learning To Be a Promise-Breaker

Has anyone ever told you that it may be healthy to break your promises? No, I’m not talking about going back on your word or taking your wedding vows lightly. I’m referring to a different category of vows … the kind of promises that people rarely acknowledge. Our...

#291: Will You Trade Your Comfort Food for The Comforter?

Are you a sugar addict? Do you run to the pantry each afternoon to get you through your day? Do you turn to Starbucks...

#288: Max Lucado Says #MeToo

Max Lucado has never pretended to be something he’s not. The beloved author and pastor has always been open about his struggles. But...

#287: Does God Want Me to Have Good Self-Esteem?

How do I convince myself and everyone else that I’m worthy of being loved? That may not be what the question...

#283: I Was the Abuser

Are you, or someone you love, a recovering sex offender? If so, this conversation is for you. In this...

#282: How Shame Impacts Us

Shame is becoming popular… in a good way. More than ever, both Christian and secular voices are calling out the messages that...

Forgiveness is Hard, Grace is Harder

We spend a lot of time as Christ-followers talking about forgiving one another. After all, Jesus taught the importance of forgiveness, saying that our Heavenly Father will not forgive us if we fail to forgive each other. That’s pretty heavy! While forgiveness is a...

#279: Why You Feel Shame When Your Spouse Cheats

A betrayed spouse often feels as much (or more) shame as their partner. In this episode Juli welcomes Dr. Sheri...

#277: Children, Teens, and Sexual Abuse

Child sexual abuse can happen anywhere and predators are typically someone a child already trusts. If your child is...

Shame Doesn’t Have the Final Word

Most women bask in the comment “You look so young!” but not Jeni. Why? Because she is young … too young to be the mom of a six-year-old girl. When Jeni goes to her daughter’s kindergarten class, she feels out of place with every other mom, many of whom are more than a...

#274: Vulnerability, Infidelity & God’s Redemption

For Jessica McDaniel, infidelity as a woman meant double the shame. In this episode, she shares the lies she believed as a teenager...

#273: Tell Someone You’re Broken

If you’re ever going to heal, you have to tell someone you’re broken. In this episode of Java with Juli, our guest shares how he...

#272: From Sexual Exploitation to Freedom (Harmony’s Story)

According to our guest, most women in the sex industry want to escape but have no other means for survival. As an abused child, rape...

#271: The Truth (and Lies) About Infertility

One in seven couples struggles with infertility --and it's easy to make some pretty hurtful assumptions about them...

#270: Winning the Battle in Your Mind

Sometimes the most difficult battles we face are the ones that rage within our own hearts and minds. In this episode, Juli gets...

#265: The Hard (and Hopeful) Truth About Losing a Spouse

“God created our bodies to become one in marriage in a very physical and neurological way. When that is suddenly...

Webinar: Surprised by the Healer

You may have heard Juli say, "We are all sexually broken." So how do we get "fixed?" Pursuing healing may involve counseling, God's Word, and having trustworthy friends around you, but ultimate healing comes when we encounter the Healer Himself. Join Dr. Juli Slattery...

#261: Bravery Means Being the Real You

You’re braver than you think. Bravery doesn’t always mean running into a burning building. For most...

#257: How Trauma Affects Our Bodies & Souls

None of us likes feeling broken; feeling as if we’re walking through life with a limp that God can’t or...

#254: Sex, Race & Healing: How We’re the Same and Different

There is no magic pill to heal from traumatic sexual experiences. In this episode Juli talks with therapist Dawn Jones about why we...

Webinar: Tackling Shame

One of the most common themes in the questions we receive at Authentic Intimacy is shame. What is it? Where does it come from? How do I get rid of it? Can God really forgive every sin? If so, why do I still have so much shame? In this webinar, we address these issues...

#252: Finding Your Voice

Sexual abuse. Fame. Infidelity and divorce. Five-time Grammy award winner Sandi Patty has walked through them all. How has she come...

#251: Praying with Honesty and Abandon

Do you pray about your sex life? About that friend you're hoping will become more than a friend? Some of us...

#250: Healing After Abortion

It’s time to let women know there is healing after abortion. While Christians rightly proclaim the sanctity...

#248: Gay Girl, Good God: Jackie’s Story

"If you ask him to, God will make you straight." Have you ever said this to a loved one who is struggling...

#169: Your Wounded Heart

It wasn’t that bad. What happened to you definitely wasn’t as bad as other abuse stories you’ve heard and read about. It’s...

#244: Your Love-Hate Relationship with Food

Do you want out of your love-hate relationship with food? This isn't a conversation about what you should or...

#239: Stop Dreading Christmas

Somewhere along the line, this "most wonderful time of the year" overwhelms us, making our souls feel both...

I Don’t Trust Myself

A few days ago, I rushed to see Toni (the lady who cuts my hair) in the middle of the work day. I got there with just a few minutes to spare after getting off a conference call. Someone else was sitting in Toni’s chair. “I’ll just wait in the lobby until you’re done,”...

Pure Sadness and a Better Way Forward

I recently read a very sad book, Pure by Linda Kay Klein. This book keeps popping up in my newsfeed which tells me that people want to talk about it. The subtitle of the book hits precisely why this book caused my heart to ache: “Inside the evangelical movement that...

#224: Sexuality & Surrender

Laurie daily submits her same-sex sexuality to the Lordship of Christ while married to her best friend, Matt. ...

#215: Miscarriage & Infertility

After years of buying baby gifts for friends, one in every eight women wonder if it will ever be her turn. Is she...

#202: Childhood Trauma and How It Impacts You

Powerful moments and memories from our childhood stick with us. They affect who we become and how we interact with others. If your...

Learning to Say “I Was Wrong”

If you are old enough to recall the sitcom Happy Days, you’ll remember “The Fonz.” Henry Winkler played the character of Arthur Fonzarelli, the coolest guy in town. The Fonz in his leather jacket and perfect hair could get all the ladies with the snap of his fingers....

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