Authentic Intimacy

#388 Single & Sexually Whole

#388 Single & Sexually Whole

The late Dr. Doug Rosenau joins Juli to discuss the difference between erotic and social sexuality, and why we need to rethink desire.

#474 A Rebel’s Manifesto: How to Live Holy Different with Sean McDowell

#474 A Rebel’s Manifesto: How to Live Holy Different with Sean McDowell

What does it look like to live life as a Christian counter-culturally? How are we called to be in the world but not of the world when it comes to engaging with others, sharing the gospel, and addressing our own sin?

In this interview, Juli hosts author and professor Sean McDowell as they discuss his new book, “A Rebel’s Manifesto.” The book serves as a call and challenge to today’s Christians, urging them to revisit God’s Word and rethink what it means to be salt and light.

#473 Repentance, Redemption, and Revolution: How to Accept the Invitation of Godly Sexuality

#473 Repentance, Redemption, and Revolution: How to Accept the Invitation of Godly Sexuality

What does it actually look like to accept the invitation to reclaim God’s design for sexuality in your life? Is the path straight, wide, and flat, or narrow, bumpy, and full of twists and turns? In this episode of Java with Juli, Juli hosts guests Cole and Caitlin Zick of Moral Revolution as they discuss their polar-opposite experiences embracing their sexuality as God intended.

#472 Embracing Grief: Why We Need to Connect Sadness, Gratitude, and Celebration

#472 Embracing Grief: Why We Need to Connect Sadness, Gratitude, and Celebration

It can often be tempting to push through the uncomfortable feelings that come with loss and try to just keep calm and carry on. But is that what we’re called to as followers of Christ? If Christ Himself took time to grieve, shouldn’t we?

Dr Greg and Erin Smalley join Juli on this episode of Java with Juli as they discuss the need to face and make sense of our pain so we can embrace real joy. 

#471 How to Understand, Celebrate, and Leverage Neurological Differences in Relationships

#471 How to Understand, Celebrate, and Leverage Neurological Differences in Relationships

There are always differences in relationships – differences in culture, differences in family of origin, differences in communication and conflict style – but what if you and someone you love just think differently? The thing is, while we may live in a world designed for neurotypical people, the world is full of people who are neurodivergent; those of us who process, learn, experience and interact with the world in ways not considered typical.

Contentment: How to Live Joyfully Through the Ups and Downs of Life

Contentment: How to Live Joyfully Through the Ups and Downs of Life

If everything in your life were to remain exactly the way it is in this current moment, do you think you could still be truly, deeply happy? As a single woman, this was something I was used to asking myself. After all, marriage was not a certainty. What surprised me...

#470 Why Did We Start Hating Men? The Toxic War on Masculinity with Nancy Pearcey

#470 Why Did We Start Hating Men? The Toxic War on Masculinity with Nancy Pearcey

When did it become normal for us as a culture not to like men? In this episode Juli’s guest is Nancy Pearcey, esteemed scholar, and author of “The Toxic War on Masculinity: How Christianity Reconciles the Sexes”. She joins Juli to discuss the roots of toxic masculinity, what it means to be a good man, and how to combat the negativity around what it really means to be a man. 

#469 Porn, Rape Culture, and Why The Battle Against Sexual Assault Starts at Home

#469 Porn, Rape Culture, and Why The Battle Against Sexual Assault Starts at Home

Did you know that on average, each year, around 463,634 Americans are victims of sexual assault? That’s a heartbreaking statistic, and it reveals a very real source of pain and trauma in contemporary American culture. What causes people to commit sexual assault? Is there a way to stop it? Dr. John Foubert joins Juli to discuss some of the reasons these numbers are so high, and what can and needs to be done to prevent sexual assault from happening.

Sexual Integrity: The Heart of Sexually Discipling Your Kids

Sexual Integrity: The Heart of Sexually Discipling Your Kids

Today’s Christian parents often feel torn between the cultural messages of sex positivity and traditional church teachings about saving sex for marriage, both of which seem fraught with potential challenges and pitfalls. While cultural messages are at odds with God’s...

#468 Teaching Your Kids How to Love Their Bodies with Francie Winslow

#468 Teaching Your Kids How to Love Their Bodies with Francie Winslow

How do we teach kids that God made their bodies and that He made their bodies good? Are there creative and intentional ways to connect with kids and help them develop a Biblical theology around their bodies?

In this episode, Juli connects with her friend Francie Winslow, a mother of six on a mission to imprint upon the hearts of her children the beauty of God’s design of their bodies and vision for their sexuality.

#467 Yes, Your Marriage Is Worth Fighting For (Here’s How to Save It)

#467 Yes, Your Marriage Is Worth Fighting For (Here’s How to Save It)

While it may be the case that many people view marriage as a periphery issue, Juli’s guest, Pastor John McGee, argues that the way we love one another in marriage is one of the ways in which our faith is truly evident — “Marriage teaches us about the gospel, and the gospel teaches us about marriage.” Tune in to today’s episode of Java with Juli to discover some of what is missing in common teaching on marriage, and how leaning into the truth of the gospel equips us to love better, not just in marriage, but in all our relationships.

#466 Enough is Enough: Recognizing and Combating Abusive Relationships

#466 Enough is Enough: Recognizing and Combating Abusive Relationships

Is there a difference between a bad relationship and a harmful one? How can you spot the difference, both in your own relationships and those of your friends and family? 

Join Juli and Dr. David Clarke as they discuss how to recognize abuse patterns of behavior, how to set boundaries, and when necessary, how to get out and create safety elsewhere.

#465 Love Dares: Using Playfulness to Build Sexual Intimacy

#465 Love Dares: Using Playfulness to Build Sexual Intimacy

If you’re a husband or wife who finds sex dull or monotonous, it may be time for you to revisit the way God designed marital sex. The truth is that God desires for you to enjoy building sexual intimacy with your spouse, not just endure it. In this podcast episode, Juli and guest Dr. Jennifer Degler talk about how God gives the gift of sexual play to couples, and the practical (and fun!) ways you can connect with your spouse.

Talking to Your Kids About Sex: Why, When, and How

Talking to Your Kids About Sex: Why, When, and How

My husband had just returned home with our youngest son after a weekend away for the sex talk. Christian, eleven at the time, sheepishly told me, “Mom, I feel like I’m too young to know all these things about sex.” I reassured him, “I know how you feel, but Dad and I...

#464 Why We Need to Remember The Dignity of Singleness

#464 Why We Need to Remember The Dignity of Singleness

Is it possible your view of singleness and marriage is less than Holy? Is it possible to find contentment, not in whether we are single or married, but in Jesus Himself? Juli and Sam Allberry discuss the dignity of singleness, finding contentment in Christ, and the key to true friendship.

#463 (Bonus) The Need for Grace in Church-Based Conversations About Sex and Gender

#463 (Bonus) The Need for Grace in Church-Based Conversations About Sex and Gender

When it comes to discussions around sex, historically the church has stayed quiet. As more and more pastors, authors, and psychologists within the church begin writing and talking about sex, the challenge becomes how to make these discussions accessible, nuanced, grace-filled, and Bible-based. In this episode, Juli speaks again with author and pastor Joshua Butler, as together they examine the challenges surrounding talking about sex from within the church.

#462 Beautiful Union: How Our Sexuality Reveals God’s Heart for Covenant Love

#462 Beautiful Union: How Our Sexuality Reveals God’s Heart for Covenant Love

What if sex and gender are not as arbitrary as many people tend to think? Is it possible that God has woven holy significance into our very DNA as gendered, sexual beings? In this episode, Juli sits down with author Joshua Butler to talk about his book, “Beautiful Union”, and the ways we can see God’s gospel message evidenced in everything from the beauty of a sunset to our own sexuality.

Does God Want Me to Love Myself?

Does God Want Me to Love Myself?

This is potentially the most controversial blog I have ever written. As I’ve often stated, the Bible isn’t primarily offensive because of what it says about our sexuality. It is offensive because of what it says about our humanity. You may disagree with what you are...

#459 How Sexual Abuse Affects You (And Why God Is Still Trustworthy)

#459 How Sexual Abuse Affects You (And Why God Is Still Trustworthy)

“What happened to me wasn’t rape.” “I didn’t stop it right away.” “I shouldn’t have been at that party in the first place.” 

If you’ve ever had thoughts like these, about yourself or someone else, your definition of sexual abuse is too narrow. Join us to learn what sexual abuse is and what consent isn’t. (And, if you’ve never been a victim of sexual assault, trust us, you know someone who has. This conversation is for you, too.)

Help! I’m in a Sexless Marriage!

Help! I’m in a Sexless Marriage!

My husband and I haven’t had sex in two years. The drought began after I had our third child. I’ve never really enjoyed sex. I was always tired, and I just didn’t think it was worth the effort anymore. Now, we don’t even talk about it.  My wife and I got married about...

#456 Overcoming Father Wounds: Trading My Pain for God’s Perfect Love

#456 Overcoming Father Wounds: Trading My Pain for God’s Perfect Love

Kia Stephens knows many women (like herself) who looked to the arms of other men for the affirmation they longed to receive from their fathers. You’ll love her humor, wisdom, and vulnerability as she shares how she traded the pain of what her earthly father couldn’t give her for the perfect love of her heavenly Father. 

Why We Don’t Experience Victory

Why We Don’t Experience Victory

I recently spoke with a young woman who despises herself because of her continual struggle with lust and pornography. She’s tried to obey God and run away from sin only to find herself falling into it once again. I’ve met other people who feel similar discouragement...

#455 How God Changed My Heart (Even After I Changed My Gender) with Laura Smalts

#455 How God Changed My Heart (Even After I Changed My Gender) with Laura Smalts

For most of her childhood, Laura wanted to be a boy. In her 20s, she began hormone therapy, had surgery and lived as Jake for nine years. But she could never quite shake the feeling that none of it was real. “I remember looking at the photo on my driver’s license and saying, ‘I’m not as happy as I think I am.'” In this episode, Laura shares her remarkable story of desperation, hope and transformation.

Help! How Much Sex is “Normal” for Married Couples?

Help! How Much Sex is “Normal” for Married Couples?

It isn’t uncommon for us to receive questions from married couples asking about a normal frequency for sex. Should they have sex once a week, twice a week, or every day?! We understand that it can be challenging for two people with different levels of desire for sex...

What Do I Do With My Sexual Desires?

What Do I Do With My Sexual Desires?

“What do I do with my sexual desire?” I’ve heard this question from men and women of every age, from those who have never married and from those who find themselves “single again.” I have also heard this question from married people who, for one reason or another, do...

#452 Porn Addiction in Marriage: How to Let God Redeem Your Story

#452 Porn Addiction in Marriage: How to Let God Redeem Your Story

When it comes to porn, the gender gap is closing. Meet two women who know that overcoming a pornography addiction or sexual shame is not about changing your behavior but about allowing Jesus to transform your identity. One is the Samaritan women who met Jesus at the well and the other is Jessica Harris, Juli’s guest on “Java with Juli.”

¿Qué hace que una relación sea íntima?

¿Qué hace que una relación sea íntima?

¿Qué hace que una relación sea íntima? Hace unos años, estaba hablando en un campus universitario sobre el diseño de Dios para la sexualidad. Durante un descanso, una joven se me acercó con una pregunta. “Dijiste que Dios me creó para la intimidad. ¿No es la intimidad...

#451 Porn Addiction and Women: Break the Silence, Bring the Hope

#451 Porn Addiction and Women: Break the Silence, Bring the Hope

When it comes to porn, the gender gap is closing. Meet two women who know that overcoming a pornography addiction or sexual shame is not about changing your behavior but about allowing Jesus to transform your identity. One is the Samaritan women who met Jesus at the well and the other is Jessica Harris, Juli’s guest on “Java with Juli.”

What Defines an Intimate Relationship?

What Defines an Intimate Relationship?

A few years ago, I was speaking at a college campus about God’s design for sexuality. During a break, a young woman approached me with a question, “You said that God created me for intimacy. Isn’t intimacy the same thing as having sex?” (Presione aquí para leer en...

#450 Breaking the Marriage Idol

#450 Breaking the Marriage Idol

We’re just gonna to say it. There’s an unspoken assumption in the Church that if you’re single there must something wrong with you—and that marriage can fix it. Are you guilty of having this thought? Join the conversation about how we’ve idolized marriage and how we can do better.