Jonathan Holmes shares with Juli how we can avoid identity traps and teach our kids to do the same.
AI Leader
How To Rebuild Intimacy After Infidelity
Should a couple who experienced infidelity give up on sex? Or is there a way to approach sex that feels safe and honest for both parties?
#531 The Basics of Talking to Kids About Sex
Dr. Julia Sadusky provides parenting tips for Christian families seeking to engage in healthy conversations with their kids about sex.
#530 Sexuality and Smartphones: How to Help Teens Thrive
Pastor James Talbert from Citizens Church Akron joins Juli to share his knowledge on teens, sex, and social media.
#524 Her Freedom Journey: A Powerful New Book Helping Women Overcome Porn And Sexual Shame
Introducing “Her Freedom Journey”, Juli and Joy’s brand new book!
#523 How Past Family Patterns Impact the Way You Love Today
“How We Love” authors, Kay and Milan Yerkovich, join Juli to explain how understanding attachment styles can improve relationships.
#535 What Men Weren’t Taught About Sex
Sam Jolman, author of “The Sex Talk You Never Got”, joins Juli to talk about what men didn’t learn about sex growing up.
#534 Four Surprising Things Killing Your Wife’s Sex Drive
Dr. Jennifer Degler discusses some of the lesser-known reasons why a woman might not feel excited about sexual intimacy with her husband.
#528 The 3 Superpowers Your Sex Life is Missing
Christian Sex Therapist Dr. Michael Sytsma joins Juli to talk about three ways couples can boost their sexual and emotional intimacy.
#527 Why Friendship, not Romance, is the Greatest Love of All
Rebecca McLaughlin explains how we’ve lost our vision for loving relationships outside the context of marriage or the nuclear family.
#554 Sex and the Female Body: How to Swap Shame For Celebration
Francie Winslow, joins Juli to explain how she is learning to embrace the goodness of God’s design for sex.
Transcript: #553 Divorce and Separation: How to Know What to Do
A transcript of Java with Juli #553, a conversation between Dr. Juli Slattery and Dr. Greg Smalley on divorce and separation.
#552 When You Want Sex More Than Your Husband Does
Sheri Mueller, LCPC, author of “I Want Him to Want Me”, joins Juli to share insights, wisdom, and encouragement.
#525 Churches and Porn: What isn’t Working and How to Change it
Sam Black explains how the Church can become a safe and healing place for those struggling with pornography.
#450 Breaking the Marriage Idol
We’re just gonna to say it. There’s an unspoken assumption in the Church that if you’re single there must something wrong with you—and that marriage can fix it. Are you guilty of having this thought? Join the conversation about how we’ve idolized marriage and how we can do better.
When Cancel Culture Invades the Church
Your social media feed is probably filled with examples of the latest person who has been “cancelled” because of something they said years ago or an unpopular position they recently expressed. Being cancelled is a weapon powerful enough to prompt teens to take their...
4 Things To Remember If Someone You Care About Is “Deconstructing”
“I don’t believe in God anymore. At least not in the God I heard about in church.” Have you heard someone you love make this statement? Have you read similar declarations from people you once admired? According to the Barna institute, this trend is likely to continue....
Reader’s Corner: “Embodied” by Dr. Preston Sprinkle
I remember standing in the grocery store checkout line not more than five years ago while listening to a podcast. The host of the podcast suggested that within just a few years, gender would be considered a fluid concept, simply a social construct, by mainstream...
Should We Use LGBTQ Inclusive Language?
Ask Anything: Interviews with Experts Laurie Krieg is a speaker, author, and co-host of The Hole in My Heart Podcast. Her mission is...
#555 Can You Have A Great Marriage Without Sex? Juli Answers Your Questions
Join Juli and Hannah for a brief exploration of good biblical theology on sex and marriage.
#553 Divorce and Separation: How to Know What to Do
Dr. Greg Smalley, joins Juli to talk about some of the options couples can explore.
#551 How Keeping Secrets Keeps Us in Shame
Jason VanRuler, author of “Get Past Your Past”, joins Juli to share some insights about secrecy and why it’s worth us living in the light.
Q&A: Are Sexual Sin and Sexual Brokenness the Same Thing?
Are Sexual Sin and Sexual Brokenness the Same Thing?
#486 Teaching Sexual Discipleship: How to Walk in Truth and Love with LGBTQ+ Kids
Kelly Urbon discusses the work she is doing in counseling parents of those who identify as LGBTQ+, and explains why this work is so necessary.
Q&A: How Can I Love Someone Who Is Struggling with Sexual Sin and Brokenness?
How do you love someone struggling with sexual sin and brokenness?
Sex and the Great Commission
Several years ago, I shared with a friend the vision of Authentic Intimacy. My friend listened patiently and then shared her honest opinion, “Why is it important to help people have better sex lives? Shouldn’t we be spending our time feeding the poor and sharing the...
Reader’s Corner: “Single, Gay, Christian” by Gregory Coles
Single, Gay, Christian by Gregory Coles is a small, easy-to read book that packs a powerful punch. Coles is exceptionally articulate and does an excellent job of communicating his thoughts and feelings. Coles wrote the book as if he is sharing his ponderings and...
4 Reasons to Join a AI Leader Cohort
Scripture is filled with examples of the importance of working with one another. We learn about iron sharpening iron in Proverbs, how two are better than one in Ecclesiastes, and the metaphor of the body of Christ throughout the New Testament. We need one another in...
2 Reasons You’re Hesitant to Talk to Your Kids About Sex (But Shouldn’t Be)
My guest on the blog is Amy Davison, co-author of Mama Bear Apologetics Guide to Sexuality.* She's going to clear up two obstacles that keep parents from teaching their kids a biblical worldview of sexuality. Discipleship is not a word you hear that often outside of...
How We Love Each Other
I grew up in a family of six kids, all very close in age. My position as “number five” out of six is probably a huge part of why I became a psychologist. My earliest pictures are often of me in a playpen observing family life. As teenagers, my sisters and I became...
When Your Adult Child Makes Sexual Choices You Disagree With
What does it look like to love God and love an adult child who has a very different sexual ethic?
Married Sex: Beyond a Sanctified Hook-Up
Why Josh Butler’s Book Beautiful Union Matters
If you pay attention to Christian Twitter, you are probably familiar with the online backlash a few weeks ago to the excerpt of Josh Butler’s forthcoming book called Beautiful Union. This short excerpt of a 288 -page book created a firestorm of criticism and dialogue...
#404: How To Help Your Kids Think About Sex From a Christian Worldview
Hillary Ferrer, co-author of Mama Bear Apologetics Guide to Sexuality, joins Juli to talk about how to teach your kids a biblical view of sex.
3 Things Women Want You To Know About Their Addiction to Pornography
As someone who serves in ministry with my own history of struggling with pornography, women often pour out their stories to me with a sigh of relief. While sitting on my living room couch, Jessica shared her struggle with porn: I was exposed to pornography as a first...
Reader’s Corner: “Understanding Sexual Abuse” by Tim Hein
My first response after reading this book was,“This guy doesn’t waste a word!” In 182 pages, Tim Hein addresses some of the most pressing and complex issues related to childhood sexual abuse, while also sharing from his own journey. Tim's official role is that of...
Reader’s Corner: “Talking Back to Purity Culture” by Rachel Joy Welcher
Purity culture has been a topic of conversation for several years as Christian women who were teenagers in the 1990’s (at the height of the purity movement) are now in their thirties and forties. Many who grew up in the evangelical purity movement are experiencing...
Reader’s Corner: “Pure” by Linda Kay Klein
I recently read a very sad book, Pure by Linda Kay Klein. This book keeps popping up in my newsfeed, which tells me that people want to talk about it. The subtitle of the book hits precisely why this book caused my heart to ache: “Inside the evangelical movement that...
Why I Went to a Marriage Intensive
In November, I took my first sabbatical since starting Authentic Intimacy in 2012. What a gift! The sabbatical was for rest and refreshment but also for personal reflection. For the past year, Mike and I have tossed around the idea of going through a marriage...
Why the Church Needs to Address Porn for Women
Pornography impacts men and women, yet when was the last time you heard a sermon on porn in your church? When was the last time you heard it specifically address women? Most female porn addicts feel alone and often feel left out of the conversation. Instead of finding...
Words Have Consequences
We live in a day and age in which there is a lot of debate about words. What’s okay to say? What is politically correct? How can we speak in ways that are not offensive? As we discuss issues like politics, racial justice, and sexuality with others, we can feel as if...
Java Pack: Conversations that Heal
This Java Pack is a Christian leader’s guide to addressing sexual pain. As Christians, we often spend a lot of time debating what we should believe about sexuality. We may devote some time to ensuring we are personally honoring God with our own sexual choices....
Q&A: How do I not pass sexual shame on to my kids?
How do you not pass sexual shame onto your kids?
#485 Your Marriage Won’t Survive Without Grace: Why Marriages Built on Performance Fall Apart
Is a lack of grace stopping you and your spouse from connecting? Brad and Marilyn Rhoads join Juli to discuss their book, “Grace Marriage.”
Webinar: Christian Psychology: Discerning when it’s helpful and harmful in ministry.
When people turn to counselors, the three questions they’re asking are: What do I do? Why did this happen? What’s the point?
In this webinar by Dr. Juli Slattery, learn how to address these questions with wisdom and compassion, and know your limitations.
Java Pack Listening Guide: Sexuality Meets Discipleship
Our culture is adept at sexual discipleship. Have you noticed? In every media outlet imaginable, we are confronted with an aggressive message of how to think about marriage, sexual activity, and sexual identity. Even Christians are far more likely to think like the...
How We Love Each Other
I grew up in a family of six kids, all very close in age. My position as “number five” out of six is probably a huge part of why I became a psychologist. My earliest pictures are often of me in a playpen observing family life. As teenagers, my sisters and I became...
Why I Care About Your Sex Life
In case you haven’t heard, Fifty Shades of Grey was recently named the best-selling book of the decade. When I saw this come through my newsfeed, my first thought was, “Here we go again…” I’m quite certain that we will have another round of debates about the relative...
#90: 25 Questions You’re Afraid To Ask About Love, Sex and Intimacy
The title of this Java With Juli says it all! Juli talks about the release of her book “25 Questions” that tackles the most common and critical questions women ask her about sexuality.
Nervous about leading a small group?
With the start of a new season begins the start of new small groups and Bible studies in your churches and ministries. Maybe you’re a new leader and you feel sick to your stomach when thinking about leading a group. Perhaps you’re scared to commit to leading, yet God...
When Christians Disagree About Sex
When the Nashville statement was released, it brought conservative Christianity’s relationship with sexual issues front and center into the mainstream media. USA Today described the Nashville statement this way, “A coalition of conservative evangelical leaders laid...
Q&A: How do I counsel a Christian couple living together before marriage?
Q&A: How do we encourage people to cultivate greater intimacy with God and others?
Q&A: What are the best ways to become more fluent in the biblical narrative of sexuality?
Q&A: How do I help a couple who is experiencing a sexless marriage?
Q&A: What are the best ways to become more fluent in the biblical narrative of sexuality?
Q&A: How can I be more sensitive when teaching those who have sexual trauma?
Q&A: What are the best ways to become more fluent in the biblical narrative of...
Q&A: How do I respond to believers referring to themselves as gay Christians?
Q&A: What are the best ways to become more fluent in the biblical narrative of sexuality?
Q&A: How do I help a couple walking through the aftermath of a betrayal?
Q&A: What are the best ways to become more fluent in the biblical narrative of sexuality?
Q&A: When someone confesses sexual sin, how do I know if it is true repentance or just remorse?
Q&A: What are the best ways to become more fluent in the biblical narrative of sexuality?
Q&A: How do I disciple someone toward biblical masculinity or femininity?
Q&A: What are the best ways to become more fluent in the biblical narrative of sexuality?
Q&A: How do we teach the biblical narrative of sexuality to teenagers?
Q&A: What are the best ways to become more fluent in the biblical narrative of sexuality?
Q&A: What are the best ways to become more fluent in the biblical narrative of sexuality?
Q&A: What are the best ways to become more fluent in the biblical narrative of sexuality?
Q&A: How do I foster unity in my church when Christians disagree about sexual issues?
Q&A: How do I foster unity in my church when people disagree about sexual issues?
Q&A: When do I refer someone to a professional counselor for sexual issues?
Q&A: When Counseling Over Sexual Issues, Where is the Line to Refer Someone to Professional Counseling?
Q&A: How Do We Make Church a Safe Place for People Who Experience Gender Dysphoria?
Q&A: How Do We Make Church a Safe Place for People Who Experience Gender Dysphoria?
Q&A: How Do We Address LGBTQ+ Issues in the Church Without Alienating People?
Q&A: How Do We Address LGBTQ+ Issues in the Church Without Alienating People?
Q&A: How do you define sexual integrity, and what does it look like? How is it different from sexual purity?
What’s the difference between sexual purity and sexual integrity?
What Church Leaders are Missing in Discussion About Same-Sex Marriage and Attraction
The conversation needs to go deeper, prompting more foundational questions of how we think about sexuality.
Preaching to the Sexually Hurting
How does a preacher minister to the sexually hurting from the pulpit? Dr. Sam Serio has some key insights.
The News and Sexual Discipleship
This summer I’ve been in my “writing cave”, spending countless hours finishing my next book about sexual discipleship, called Rethinking Sexuality. (The message of this book is challenging Christians to be grounded in biblical truth and equipping them to surrender...
Q&A: How Do I Have Conversations with Someone Who Wants to Join Our Church but has Different Views on Sexuality?
Q&A: How Do I Have Conversations with Someone Who Wants to Join Our Church but has Different Views on Sexuality?
Q&A: How Can an Environment of Openness Around Biblical Sexuality be Promoted Among Ministry Leadership?
Q&A: How Can an Environment of Openness Around Biblical Sexuality be Promoted Among Ministry Leadership?
Q&A: How Do You Foster a Church Culture that Addresses Sexual Issues?
How do foster a church culture that addresses sexual issues?
Hablando a Tus Hijos Sobre el Sexo: Por qué, Cuándo, y Cómo
Mi esposo recien habia regresado a la casa con nuestro hijo menor después de un fin de semana fuera para una charla sobre el sexo. Christian, con once años en ese momento, tímidamente me dijo, “Mamá, me siento demasiado joven para saber todas estas cosas sobre el...
They’re Right. Abstinence-Only Education Doesn’t Work.
The New York Times and other prominent news sources recently reported that there is now proof that abstinence-only programs don’t work. A meta-analysis of data (this means analyzing data from a number of different studies) “found no good evidence that such programs...