Is sex necessary for intimacy?
Sexual Desire
What Do I Do With My Sexual Desires?
“What do I do with my sexual desire?” I’ve heard this question from men and women of every age, from those who have never married and from those who find themselves “single again.” I have also heard this question from married people who, for one reason or another, do...
Q&A: Is Sending Nudes and Homemade Porn Okay if We’re Married?
What’s okay to do sexually in marriage?
Q&A: Is It My Responsibility to Meet My Spouse’s Sexual Needs?
Is it your responsibility to meet your spouse’s sexual needs?
Prioritize Sexual Intimacy by Getting Your Body Ready, Part 2
Much of my work in helping people navigate sexual issues revolves around how we think about sex. Your thought life, and your understanding of God and sex, are very important to your sex life. However, the basic truth is this: you can’t have sex without a body. Sex,...
#390: Have You Given Up On Sexual Enjoyment and Pleasure?
Are you resigned to the idea that God must have created sex for your husband, but not for you? Juli and her guest, Dr. Debra Taylor,...
Webinar Series: Sexual Pleasure: How To Get Your Mind and Body to Work Together, Pt 2
Overcoming Physical Barriers to Pleasure Part 2 in this webinar series Meet Dr. Carol Tanksley, OB-GYN. She has over 28 years of experience and a passion help women understand how their bodies are integrated with their minds, spirits, and emotions. In this webinar,...
Webinar Series: Sexual Pleasure: How To Get Your Mind and Body to Work Together, Pt 1
The Priority of Mutual Pleasure in Healthy Sex Part 1 in this webinar series Juli and Dr. Debra Taylor, a certified Christian sex therapist, discuss the importance of pleasure within the larger picture of sexual intimacy, and how the pleasure we experience during sex...
Predictability and Passion Can Improve a Boring Sex Life
If you are married, there is a very good chance that you and your spouse have different sexual appetites. This not only applies to how often you want to have sex, but also to how adventurous you would each like to be in the bedroom. A healthy sex life has aspects of...
#294: When You Want Sex, But Your Spouse Doesn’t
In every marriage, there is typically one partner with a higher sexual drive. And that person is usually trying to convince the...
#276: Parenthood, Exhaustion & Avoiding Sex
She's a busy and tired mama. He's stressed to the max with work and family. Can't they just put sex and...
#259: Our Marriage Survived Painful Sex
Jennifer went to her doctor to get help for the excruciating pain she felt during sex. She left with a clean bill of...
Q&A: Is It Possible For The Woman to Be The Higher Drive Partner?
Are husbands always the higher desire partners?
Prioritize Sexual Intimacy by Getting Your Bedroom Ready, Part 3
One very practical and creative way to work on sexual intimacy in your marriage is to put thought and intention into the physical space of your bedroom. Whether or not you are aware of it, the environment of your bedroom impacts your sexual intimacy. Here is a quick...
Prioritize Sexual Intimacy by Getting Your Mind Ready, Part 1
“Your most important sex organ is your brain.” I remember when I first heard this statement as a young married woman. Enjoying sex is practically impossible without thinking about it. Both men and women can struggle to know how to think about sex in a way that is...
What To Wear in the Bedroom?
Do you need to change what you wear in the bedroom? Like me, maybe you choose your sleepwear based on comfort and not to entice. I much prefer Life is Good to Victoria Secret in the bedroom, but we will save that conversation for another day. Even though I sometimes...
#350: Making Time To Make Love (Especially When You Don’t Feel Like It)
It's hard to prioritize sexual intimacy when you don't understand why God created sex in the first place. Instead, you put up walls...
Your Sexual Differences Can Make You Better Lovers
Have you ever wondered why God made you and your husband so different? For many years, I thought that might be my first question to God when I got to heaven. The differences between me and my husband, particularly in the bedroom, were driving us both crazy. Sexual...
I’m Single & Have No Sexual Desire
“I don’t feel sexual desire toward my boyfriend/fiancé. Should I stay single?” Let me introduce you to three different women who have asked me this question for very different reasons: Chelsey has been dating Drew for two years. They have a deep affection for each...
#179: When Sex Is Not Good
"I know that orgasm should not be the main goal of sex, but I am disappointed that I have never experienced it." "I can’t say that...
#56: When Men Don’t Want Sex
“Not tonight, honey. I’m just not in the mood.” The stereotype of a woman who is trying to avoid intimacy with her husband by using...
#41: Divorce and Remarriage
Java with Juli doesn’t shy away from the tough issues! Join Dr. Juli Slattery as she discusses two of the most polarizing topics in...
#123: How Sexual Differences in Marriage Can Make You a Better Lover
“Lord, I’ll do anything—just not that!” Being vulnerable, giving, and asking for your needs in...
Help! My Husband Is The One With The Headache
Watch a movie or flip through some TV sitcoms and you will hear men always want sex. Men are portrayed as constantly turned on and trying to get their wives into bed while the women are typically shown rolling their eyes. Ask a group “What do men think about most...
How to say “Yes, Yes, Yes!” after “No, No, No!”
As we round the corner into late spring, it’s wedding season. Although every new marriage has its unique struggles, some questions newlyweds ask are somewhat predictable. One of them is represented by the title of this blog. This question is not just asked by the...
Q&A: How Often Is ‘Normal’ for Having Sex Within Marriage?
How can you know if you’re having sex enough in marriage?
#454 Mismatched in Sexual Desire? You May Be Closer Than You Think
If you’re married and experiencing huge gaps between your level of sexual desire and your spouse’s, this special re-air episode is for you.
#457 How To Build a Flourishing (not Flawless) Sex Life You’ll Both Love
Take the guess work out of your sex life and learn how to tell (or show) your spouse what feels good in the bedroom.
What If I Hate Sex?
"I hate sex. It makes me angry to hear you even suggest that I’m supposed to be enjoying it. I’ve been married twenty-three years...
What If I Want Sex More Than My Husband Does?
I get asked this a lot. A woman often sheepishly approaches me at an event and says, “I’m one of those women you talked about who has a higher sex drive than my husband. What should I do?” Because women in this situation defy the stereotype, they sometimes feel shame...
¿Qué hago con mis deseos sexuales?
“¿Qué hago con mis deseos sexuales?” He escuchado esta pregunta por parte de hombres y de mujeres, por parte de personas que nunca han estado casadas y por parte de personas que ahora son “solteros de nuevo.” También he escuchado esta pregunta por parte de personas...
Don’t Be Spontaneous In Marriage
Want to watch a group of women swoon? Tell a story about a husband who was completely spontaneous. There is something about the mystery and surprise of impromptu romance that fills women with passion! Anything from randomly picking up flowers to a last minute road...
Help! How Much Sex is “Normal” for Married Couples?
It isn’t uncommon for us to receive questions from married couples asking about a normal frequency for sex. Should they have sex once a week, twice a week, or every day?! We understand that it can be challenging for two people with different levels of desire for sex...
3 Ways To Make Sexual Intimacy a Priority in Your Marriage
It’s often said, “Show me your calendar, and I’ll tell you what is important to you.” There are a lot of things we say are important to us but end up taking a back seat to busyness and the distractions that clamor for our attention. Intimacy in marriage is usually one...
Being Sexy Has Nothing To Do With Your Body
When I talk to women about sex in marriage, one of the most common concerns is their bodies. “I’m just not sexy!” Practically every woman feels like she is either too old, too fat, too flat-chested, or too plain to be sexy. We live in a world that has definite...
Making Time for Making Love
After a long day of taking care of three little boys, cooking, cleaning, and juggling work responsibilities, I had reached the “finish line.” It was my time to rest. I ignored the subtle flirtations of my husband, Mike, hoping he would get the hint that I was not in...