by Authentic Intimacy


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#9: The Guys' Side (Re-Air)

"My wife has no desire for sex. She doesn't want it, doesn't need it... and it seems like there is nothing I can do to change it. Now what?" Believe it or not, we get emails like this one from guys all the time. And today, we have answers. In this episode, Juli sits down with Dr. Greg Smalley and Dr. David Clarke to hear the guys' side on what men struggle with when it comes to intimacy with their wives.
Guests: Dr. Greg Smalley & Dr. David Clarke

Comments

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  • Lydia Affolter

    This was so interesting. The guys were really funny but I so appreciated their honesty. They way they tackled the questions was great.
  • John Prin

    Thanks for this male perspective on this vital topic. It caught my eye right away, mainly because I hear the same or similar comments from several Christian husbands I know. In a day or two, I will listen to the podcast carefully and provide more specifics. Meanwhile, I'm getting ready for my grandson's birthday party and have to go!
  • John Prin

    Sadly, the lament of the three frustrated husbands at the beginning of the podcast is all too common. In the men’s groups I’ve facilitated, the loss of sexual interest and collateral damage of diminished intimacy is a common theme expressed among husbands, particularly in 10- to 40-year marriages. Long-term solutions to this unfortunate predicament are evasive. When couples give up their hopes for satisfaction and intimacy, causes are often hard to identify. The usual suspects of overcommitted schedules and demanding careers can be addressed with a counselor IF both spouses participate. Often, only one spouse is motivated to improve the couple’s love life, while both suffer. In my experience, the spouse most reluctant or even flat-out opposed to change is frequently the wife. Each couple faces their own set of issues, of course, but for Christians the centuries-old negative warnings and misinformation perpetrated by the church -- “sex is sinful and dirty and the road to ruin” -- is invariably a major culprit. Regrettably, the burden of shame and condemnation falls heaviest on girls in their youth. Yet the Bible offers scriptural evidence of God’s vision for regular, pleasurable, satisfying love-making for both spouses who seek “one flesh” unity. It takes courage, but couples who experience spiritual and sexual wholeness are out there.

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