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Sexual Pleasure Isn't Shameful

God cares about your sex life. It may seem weird to see the words God and sex in the same sentence. Sometimes when I teach women on this topic, they have a visceral reaction to the concept of God knowing about their sex lives. Psalm 139 tells us that God is always with us. There is nowhere we can go to hide from his presence—not even the bedroom! Why is there such a disconnect for a wo...

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Chapter One - Free Resource

Whereas most sexuality studies for singles focus solely on purity—simply offering a “don’t do it” or “just wait” message—Sex and the Single Girl presents a broader understanding of what it means to honor God with our sexuality. This resource will equip single women to understand their sexuality, trust the Lord for redemption and healing, and stand against the cultural trends that marginalize an...

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How to Have Tough Conversations

If you listen to our podcast, Java with Juli, you know that I don’t like small talk. Ever since I was a little girl, I have been able to acutely sense unspoken tension in a room. I’m anxious when I have a conflict with a friend or family member, and have trouble finding peace until it is addressed. Maybe this is why I chose to become a psychologist: The counseling room is one of the...

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Why the Word "Purity" is Cringy

By: Dr. Juli Slattery My teenage sons have recently introduced me to a new word… “cringy.” It’s how they describe my attempts to dance and many of my lame puns. But it’s also the word many would associate with the term “sexual purity.” As a ministry, we’ve shied away from teaching about “sexual purity,” substituting it with the con...

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Should Christian Women March?

Yesterday, Mike and I were in downtown Denver to visit a friend in the Denver trauma hospital. On the way, we stopped by Whole Foods to get some snacks for our friends as they pass the long hours in the hospital. “Why are the streets so busy on a Saturday morning?” we asked as we checked out. “Oh, it’s the women’s march,.” the cashier answered. Another c...

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Pornography & Our Kids

Our nation was recently appalled to discover that a city government in Flint, Michigan has been serving their citizens poisonous water for over a year. When concerns were raised, government officials gaffed them off as isolated incidents. Tragically, young children have been exposed to lead poisoning which will likely result in brain damage and other long-term ailments. Gaining much less pre...

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Encountering the Radical Love of Jesus

Through our work at Authentic Intimacy, Linda Dillow and I have met hundreds of women on a healing journey. Some are dealing with sexual trauma, others infidelity and betrayal, and still others can’t shake the shame from their past. We have witnessed the power of our God’s healing and believe that he invites each of us to exchange our “ashes for beauty” and “our mo...

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How to say “Yes, Yes, Yes!” after “No, No, No!”

As we round the corner into late spring, it’s wedding season. Although every new marriage has its unique struggles, some questions newlyweds ask are somewhat predictable. One of them is represented by the title of this blog. This question is not just asked by the bride who has waited for marriage, but also for those who have “tasted the forbidden fruit” of sexual pleasure a...

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The Good News about Fifty Shades Darker

The second installment of the Fifty Shades trilogy just hit the big screen. We’ve had this conversation before - first about the book and then about the original movie. We’ve sounded the alarm about the dangers of pornography and other forms of counterfeit intimacy. (You can read a blog about Meeting Mr. Grey, listen to a podcast about the books, or read a blog on sexual junk food....

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How Do I Overcome Sexual Fantasies?

Dr. Juli Slattery answers the question, "I struggled with masturbation as a single woman for 10 years. Now, as a married woman, I struggle to orgasm without having sexual fantasies. How do I overcome this?"