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God Says Not To Judge... Right?

Whenever I write a blog on a controversial sexual issue, I typically hear from people who remind me that God says not to judge other people. Whether I’m teaching about pornography, Fifty Shades of Grey, living together outside of marriage, divorce or homosexuality, some people simply write off what I’ve said because they think I’m being judgmental. The “who are you to ju...

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Your Marriage Should Be Fun

Someone once asked my husband, Mike, “What’s it like being married to a psychologist?” Mike answered, “It’s great. I get to sleep with my therapist.” In all seriousness, there are some very frustrating things about having a wife who is a psychologist. Probably the greatest drawback is that I always notice what is wrong. Remember the story of “The Pri...

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Why We Don’t Experience Victory

I recently spoke with a young woman who despises herself because of her continual struggle with lust and pornography. She’s tried to obey God and run away from sin only to find herself falling into it once again. I’ve met other people who feel similar discouragement in their marriage or on their healing journey. Why do followers of Jesus stay captive to sin? Why doesn’t God...

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What Does the Bible Say About Homosexuality?

Can a person live a gay lifestyle and follow Christ? Is it even fair to ask someone with same-sex attraction to live a celibate life? Is Scripture’s teaching on this matter clear? Homosexuality is a divisive topic among Christians and in the broader culture, as evidenced by media coverage surrounding the Supreme Court’s recent decision. But this is not merely an issue to be debated&...

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How We Love Each Other

I grew up in a family of six kids, all very close in age. My position as “number five” out of six is probably a huge part of why I became a psychologist. My earliest pictures are often of me in a playpen observing family life. As teenagers, my sisters and I became good friends. We stopped fighting and began to really appreciate one another. My father one day said to us, “Wh...

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When Your Kids Look at Porn

Somedays as the mom of three sons, I wish I could be parenting in a different era… one in which cell phones did not exist and comic books were more common than pornography. Yet we do not choose the time and place which God inserts us into history. Pornography and the many sexual consequences associated with it are a regrettable part of the fabric of our society. Unfortunately, I don&rsqu...

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The World Has a Lot to Say About Sex

If you haven’t noticed, our views on sexuality have changed quite a bit over the past 20 years. Americans are far more accepting of behaviors they once considered to be sexually immoral. Cohabitation, having sex outside of marriage, no-fault divorce, viewing pornography, gender fluidity, and polygamy, among others, have dramatically gained approval in our cultural context. Politicians and...

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I’m Single & Have No Sexual Desire

By Dr. Juli Slattery “I don’t feel sexual desire toward my boyfriend/fiancé. Should I stay single?” Let me introduce you to three different women who have asked me this question for very different reasons: Chelsey has been dating Drew for two years. They have a deep affection for each other and want to share their lives together, but Chelsey avoids physical dis...

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Your Spouse Doesn't Complete You

When is the last time you felt disappointed by your marriage? Notice that I asked when, not if. Disappointment is a normal part of any relationship, but it hits us particularly hard in marriage. We live in a day and time when marriage is presented as an answer for your loneliness, insecurities, sexual frustration and romantic longings. Marriage is supposed to make you happy, right? Your husb...

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Don’t Be Spontaneous In Marriage

Want to watch a group of women swoon? Tell a story about a husband who was completely spontaneous. There is something about the mystery and surprise of impromptu romance that fills women with passion! Anything from randomly picking up flowers to a last minute road trip "just to get away together". Romantic comedies and chick flicks have picked up on this desire in women- for a man to ...

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