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Drowning in Shallow Christianity

I recently met with a friend who shared openly with me about her struggles in marriage. “It’s like living with a robot! He doesn’t seem to know how to connect emotionally. Am I supposed to live the next thirty years with this man? Does God really want me to be so lonely?” I have heard echoes of this dear woman’s questions in so many other situations. My single f...

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Sex is the Icing on the Cake

Growing up, I was never much of a cook. With three sisters and a mother who all cook and bake masterfully, I had no reason to learn how. As a wife and mother, I reluctantly accepted my role as the family chef. A few years ago, I attempted to bake a homemade cake for a dinner party. I measured all of the ingredients carefully, preheated the oven, and baked my cake at the exact temperature the...

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A Perfect Marriage

Mike and I recently attended a wedding. The bride was stunning, and the groom gleamed with pride. Not a dry eye in the place. Weddings are beautiful—not just because of the music, flowers, dresses, and tuxes, but also because they represent young, unblemished love. Like the birth of a child, the beginning of a new family holds unending promise and boundless dreams that have not yet been t...

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A Secret for the Guys

Every day we hear from men who desperately want help and encouragement for their wives. Most commonly, they complain that their wives are not interested in sexual intimacy. Many of these messages end with pleas like “Help me! What can I do to help her understand my needs?” While most of my work is with women, today I want to share a secret with the men. It is the same secret that...

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Your Sexual Differences Can Make You Better Lovers

Have you ever wondered why God made you and your husband so different? For many years, I thought that might be my first question to God when I got to heaven. The differences between me and my husband, particularly in the bedroom, were driving us both crazy. Sexual intimacy created more conflict in our marriage than unity and more pain than pleasure. It seemed like a cruel joke or a gift that we...

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Is There Really a 7-Year Itch?

My husband and I are leading a Bible study with mostly newlywed couples. After a few weeks, we noticed how often we referred to the seven-year-something . . . itch? pit? slump? The other couples in the group started nervously teasing about what terrible blockade may lay in their marriage journey. Is the seven-year-itch a real thing? If so, are you doomed to bump into it? And why does it happ...

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When Your Child Has Been Sexually Abused

The headlines are filled with horrific accounts of childhood sexual abuse. Behind every headline are children and their parents, families grasping for help and hope through devastating news. We have received many emails from parents who recently discovered that their children have been sexually violated. While we grieve with you, we also want to equip you. Sexual abuse should never happen! Whil...

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Manhood on a Razor's Edge

Last week, I spent $44 at Costco on Gillette razor blades for my husband. When I heard Gillette had just released a controversial video on toxic manhood, I wondered if I would regret my purchase. Having just watched the Gillette commercial, I couldn’t be more encouraged. I understand that some view it as a criticism of masculinity, but I see it as an invitation to reclaim the valor and va...

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R. Kelly and a Reminder of Evil

As we jump into 2019, we are unfortunately familiar with tragic headlines. Checking your Twitter feed or listening to the day’s news will almost certainly involve learning something that makes your heart sink. Today is no exception as our news feeds are filled with reactions to R. Kelly’s horrific acts of sexual abuse. Because stories like this one are becoming tragically commonp...

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Your Husband Needs You Too

I vividly remember life as it was about 15 years ago. A newborn, a 4-year-old and a 6-year-old, all boys. Most mornings, I woke up to someone crying or pleading for breakfast. From the time my feet hit the ground until I went to bed, someone needed me. I was acutely aware of the demands of my three sons. Without me, they would have no clothes, food, comfort or safety. My days were preoccupied w...

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