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A Road Map to Sexual Integrity in the Midst of Sexual Brokenness

Do you want to know the question that keeps me up at night? It’s this: How can I honor God with my sexuality in the face of my sexual brokenness and unmet desires? At Authentic Intimacy, we often use words like sexual wholeness or sexual integrity instead of sexual purity. The first time I remember hearing this distinction, I was skeptical. Isn’t that just a fancy repackaging of...

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Q&A: As I Grow in Sexual Integrity, Can I Stop Using Accountability Software?

I use content filters and parental controls on my devices to help me avoid pornography. Is it OK to use these tools forever, or should I be aiming to learn to live in sexual integrity without these guardrails? Joy Skarka shares how accountability software can provide both safety and assurance, even when you've been walking in freedom from porn for years. You may also find these videos...

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Q&A: How Long Do You Wait To Restore Trust After Lying and Infidelity?

How long should it take you to trust someone again after lying and infidelity has taken place? It depends... there is a lot more to it than just the passage of time. Here Juli shares a few things that need to happen during the restoration period in order to rebuild trust and intimacy. If you're rebuilding trust in a relationship, here are a few other resources that might help you: ...

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Are You a Good Friend? 7 Keys to Building Healthy Friendship

Several months ago, a friend invited me to coffee. After catching up on kids and ministry, I noticed her countenance shift. She obviously was struggling to share something difficult with me. After a few deep breaths, my friend explained how several years ago I had said and done things that deeply hurt her. I felt horrible for my insensitivity and for how I had hurt her without realizing the imp...

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Q&A: Where Is the Balance Between Doing My Part and Trusting God to Do His?

Where is the balance between personal integrity and trusting in God to do only what He can do? Will I just have to get used to being disappointed in myself and my sin? When it comes to breaking free from sexual sin, there are things you can do and there are things only God can do. Here, Juli shares how to walk with God as you do your part, trusting that He is faithful to do His. You ma...

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5 Ways the Church Must “Step Up” in Response to Sexual Abuse Within Its Walls

A few weeks ago, the Christian world was rocked by a bombshell revelation. An independent report of the Southern Baptist Convention (SBC) documented a pattern of ignoring and silencing victims of sexual abuse within the denomination. While there were rumblings of trouble a few years ago, even the leaders who called for the investigation were horrified by what it revealed. Russel Moore, who was ...

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Q&A: Great Guy. No Sexual Chemistry. Should I Marry Him Anyway?

Hi Juli, I’ve dated a great man for almost a year. Some days I think attraction is not super important; but other days I look at his photo and think, “I don't want him to touch my body.” Should I marry this wonderful man because the journey of sexual intimacy is going to have disappointments anyway? In this video, Juli helps you think through physical attraction and ho...

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How To Go From Demand and "Duty Sex" to True Sexual Intimacy

As Roy and Stacy listened to their pastor teach on I Corinthians 7, they began to shift uncomfortably in their seats. “Paul is saying here that a wife is to meet her husband’s sexual needs. If she doesn’t, he may be tempted to seek sex outside of their relationship.” The pastor tried to dampen the tension in the room with an ill-advised joke. “Men, maybe you are li...

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Q&A: What if I'm Not Sexually Compatible With the Person I Want To Marry?

What if we're not sexually compatible? In this video, Juli shares everything you need to know about sexual incompatibility—including how it can make you a better lover. Looking for more? Check out these resources: Your Sexual Differences Can Make You Better Lovers (Juli's blog) Honest Answers to Your Questions About Sex (Juli's blog) Q&A: How Do I Get Past ...

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How To Help Little Ones Celebrate How God Made Their Bodies

I'm happy to welcome Francie Winslow back to the blog. You can learn more from Francie at her website. I was cuddled up with my youngest son on the couch when the well-known cartoon “Blues Clues” popped up on the screen. Along with flashy colors came a classic tune, “Ants Go Marching One by One.” But instead of hearing the normal lyrics that I expected to match th...

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